Always Darkest Before The Dawn REVISED
by Mel J1701
Summary: While hunting down Darla, Angel is given a glimpse of the future and witnesses first hand the repercussions of his actions and he doesn't like what he sees...
1. Parts One and Two

**Title: ** Always Darkest Before The Dawn (REVISED)  
**Author: ** Mel (e-mail me at cosmic_quest@yahoo.com)   
**Disclaimer: **The characters of 'Buffy: The Vampire Slayer' and 'Angel' are all the property of Joss Whedon, the WB and Mutant Enemy, Inc and no profit has been made by my utilizing them in this story. All the other characters belong to the author of this story (i.e., me!).   
**Rating: ** PG-13 for language and angst.   
**Pairings:**Angel/Cordelia   
**Summery: **While hunting down Darla and Drusilla, Angel is given a glimpse of the future and witnesses first hand the repercussions of his actions...   
**Spoilers: ** This story takes part in the middle of the episode 'Reprise'.   
**Archiving: ** As long as you ask first, it should be okay.   
**Author's Notes: ** Although Cordelia doesn't appear much early on, this is very much a C/A fiction so don't let Cordelia's absence put you off. Also, most of the fiction come from Angel's perspective since it is largely his story. I have since revised this story so there are some elements which have changed greatly from the original version.  
**Web Page:** http://www.geocities.com/cosmic_quest/index.htm   
_______________________________________________________________________   
  
_'Here's to the child and all he has to teach us."_   
** Ancient Proverbs**   
  
**-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-**   
  
**"I'm bored. Give me the stake and let's just dust him then be done with him."**   
  
**"Is that your solution to everything?"**   
  
**"You know what your problem is? It's that you worry too much. It's not good for someone our age to stress over every little thing; you need to relax more like me"**   
  
**"I only worry too much because you worry too little."**   
  
**Angel groaned, more than ready to ream Cordelia and Wesley out for daring to allow their childish bickering to disrupt his sleep. It was only when his throbbing head cleared enough for him to realize that he was not in his bed and it was not his associates arguing. The female voice was reproving and too earnest to be his Seer's and the male voice carried an American accent and a cool edge so lacking in that of Wesley's soft bumbling. Besides, he had fired both them four weeks ago.**   
  
**As his awareness increased, he became conscious of the persistent pain in his left and ribs not to mention his poor head. From the padded hard surface supporting him, Angel guessed he was lying on a couch with a woollen blanket covering him.**   
  
**What the hell had happened?**   
  
**Forcing open his eyes, Angel blinked against the bright light of the room, his eyes adjusting. The first thing he took in was the fact that the curtains were thankfully shut thus blocking out the burning sun scorching outside. Then he found himself being gravely regarded by two teenagers- a blond girl and a dark-haired boy.**   
  
**"Well, well, well, Sleeping Beauty awakens," murmured the boy, toying with a stake and smirking at Angel's bewilderment.**   
  
**"Wh...Where am I?" Angel asked, his voice hoarse.**   
  
**"You're in Sunnydale, of course," replied the girl in mild puzzlement, deftly snatching the stake from her friend and placing it out of his reach.**   
  
**Sunnydale...? What was going on?**   
  
**The last thing he could recall clearly was Darla's rage when her attempts to bed and desoul him had failed. He had then tracked Darla and Drusilla down to an abandoned warehouse on the outskirts of ****Los Angeles**** only to be attacked by a pack of vampires. He had been greatly outnumbered and was remembered Darla's bewitching laughter echo through the air as he was pushed twenty foot from the warehouse roof.**   
  
**He had been so close; so close to finally ridding the world of his Sire and returning back to his life with Cordelia, Wesley and Gunn. Angel knew that in his desperation to be reunited with Cordelia and rekindle the relationship that they were beginning to establish before he fired her, he had become reckless when it came to Darla. And now he wasn't sure what that carelessness had cost him.**   
  
**Judging from the boy's casually cool glare, the youngster was just itching to grab at the stake and ram it through Angel's unbeating heart. The mocking challenge burning in boy's near black eyes chilled Angel for it reminded him so much of the emotions he associated with his alter ego Angelus. Strange considering the boy couldn't have been much more than sixteen years old and human at that. Oddly though, there was a hint of something supernatural in his aura, almost vampiric despite his apparent humanity.**   
  
**By comparison, the girl looked a typical all-American teenager, her corn silk blond hair was pulled back from her twinkling sky blue eyes that exuded a warmth so contrasting to her darker boyfriend. Her mannerisms and attitude reminded him a little of a younger Buffy when she had first arrived in Sunnydale, carefree and energetic.**   
  
**Nonetheless, like Buffy, Angel had the distinct feeling that this girl was not all as innocent as she appeared.**   
  
**No, over two hundred years of moving in the circles of the demonic and undead, Angel could sense that these were not normal teenage children and something was most definitely not quite right in Sunnydale. That wasn't unusual in itself but, even for the Hellmouth, there was something very wrong going on here...**   
  
**Attempting to sit up on the couch, Angel found that while he was free to move, his hands and legs were secured with rope.**   
  
**The boy smirked in amusement at the vampire's struggles. "You didn't think we were just going to let you roam freely, did you? I don't think so. Now, care to tell us what you're doing in these parts?"**   
  
**"I...I don't know," Angel answered honestly.**   
  
**"Uh-uh, that's a likely story."**   
  
**"I think he might be telling the truth," the girl said in Angel's defence.**   
  
**"Oh, Ashleigh, don't be so gullible. Just 'cause our parents knew him doesn't mean he's Mr Joe Regular. I say we stake him."**   
  
**The girl- Ashleigh- just shook her head in resignation. "Brendan, if you had your way, you'd kill anything that stood in your path."**   
  
**"Yeah," admitted the boy, apparently named Brendan. He then shrugged helplessly. "So?"**   
  
**This was an extreme case of 'good cop, bad cop' with Ashleigh in role of protecting Angel from her friend, Brendan playing an excellent version of 'bad cop'. It was evident these kids were certainly aware of vampires and the dark side that existed in their midst. And given that they both seemed to know him then they were probably young friends of the Scooby Gang or, given their age, more likely friends of Dawn Summers.**

**If so, then help was at hand.**  
  
**His thoughts, much to his relief, were confirmed when Ashleigh said, "Let's just wait for Giles to get here and we'll see."**   
  
**Brendan glowered at her. "Come on, Ash, Giles has more important things to worry about just now than _*him*_." There was a deep hatred in the youngster's undertone when he referred to Angel; it was almost as if the boy knew exactly who he was. "And I think _*I* have the right more than anyone to decide his fate."_**   
  
**Angel tried to strain to his feet as the boy reached for the stake, wondering what Brendan meant by having the prerogative to kill him. Threatened, he struggled to resist his demon's demands for self-protection but he couldn't halt the growl from his throat.**   
  
**"Go ahead," Brendan challenged, not in the least intimidated, "vamp out. It's just more of an invitation for me and my friend, Mr Stake."**   
  
**Before the teenager could make his move, he was stopped by the girl's strong grip.** **"Brendan Chase, don't you dare!"**   
  
**The name or, more specifically, the boy's surname, brought Angel's exertions to a halt. How could he even think of harming a boy who could be Cordelia's family? She never mentioned having a younger brother but one never knew.**   
  
**"Chase? Are you related to Cordelia Chase?"**   
  
**The boy just snorted. "I should damn well hope so...I'm her son."**   
  
  
**End of Chapter One**   
  
  
**+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++**   
  
  
**Chapter Two**   
  
**"What?!"**   
  
**Son?! The damned kid was in his mid teens, around fifteen or sixteen years old; Cordelia was not even twenty yet. To even suggest Brendan was her child was as ridiculous as Angelus volunteering to join the priesthood. Someone had obviously been feeding this poor deluded boy a pack of lies, either that or Brendan 'Chase' was experimenting drugs as his extracurricular activity.**   
  
**"Don't think by denying everything, it somehow absolves you," Brendan glared, succeeding in wavering Angel's refutation.**   
  
**But it was Ashleigh's open and honest gaze that jolted the vampire. "Why are you acting so weird? You know more than anyone that he's Cordy's son," she said, apparently puzzled by his incredulous reaction. "I mean, I know it's been a few years since you visited our dear old Sunnyhell but that isn't that long."**   
  
**"Okay," Angel said, holding his hands up, "who are you kids? What is going on here?" He then scowled suspiciously, a thought coming to him. "If Darla put you up to this, there's going to be some blood shed tonight."**   
  
**The girl exchanged a troubled glance with the boy. "My name is Ashleigh Eleanor Summers, I'm the daughter of Buffy Summers. You know that, Angel, you were the one who brought me to Sunnydale in the first place."**   
  
**"Brought you to Buffy?" he repeated, scepticism dripping heavily in his tone.**   
  
**Now this was becoming sheer ludicrous. So, this girl was Buffy's daughter? And when did Buffy find the time to have this child- in between nursery and kindergarten? And what was all this talk about bringing Buffy's own daughter to her? One would have thought if this girl was making up a story then she could at least make the details plausible.**   
  
**Angel wasn't sure what his sire hope to achieve with this game but obviously those years of being dust in the wind had whittle down Darla's intelligence. Did she honestly think he would fall for this charade? Still, he had to hand it to them, these kids had the acting skills Cordy would kill for. If he didn't know any better, he would actually think they believed their little web of lies. Darla must have gone all out for this.**   
  
**"Yes," Ashleigh replied, adamant despite his scorn and dubiousness, "when I was a baby, about a year-and-a-half. You found me on the streets, my biological parents were killed after being attacked by demons. You checked but there were no other relatives for me to go to."**   
  
**"Say this is all true, why would I bring you to Buffy? Why not the police?"**   
  
**"Because I'm the Slayer, the ****Chosen**** One who was destined to relieve my mom of her duties when I came of age. Lorne, on the advice of the Powers That Be, told you to take me to the present Slayer who, of course, happened to be Buffy Summers. She went on to raise me as her daughter."**   
  
**"Lorne?" Angel repeated in askance.**   
  
**"Yeah, y'know, that green anagogic demon friend of yours, he's also kinda Bren's uncle."**   
  
**This was all craziness, yet for some reason, Angel found himself starting to believe these kids and their ridiculous story. Their sincerity, even that of the boy whose hatred towards Angel was more than discernible, was tangible to the vampire who had made a profession out of reading people's characters. Besides, how else could the girl know of his connection to the MC Demon to the extent that she even seemed to know his name, though the part of him being the boy's uncle was a puzzle.**   
  
**A newspaper lay strewn nearby caught Angel's eye and he manoeuvred himself so he could read it at a better angle. It was a copy of 'The Sunnydale Post', the headline title embellished with the words 'Curse Returns? Another High School Student Dead'. Beneath the main headline told the story of a seventeen-year-old Sunnydale High student who was found ripped to pieces in the school gym. The last Angel had heard, there was no ****Sunnydale****High School****, it had been destroying in the graduation massacre the year the Scooby Gang left.**   
  
**Still, this news was not what had captured his attention. It was something far more chilling. The fact that the newspaper was dated in bold print '****June 12th 2018****'. He gazed up from the tabloid to the expectant stares of the two teenagers- the girl exuding patience and worry, the boy just glaring in disgust.**   
  
**Could these children- not much younger than the Scoobies themselves- truly be the offspring of Cordelia Chase and Buffy Summers? Ashleigh, evidently being an adopted child, bore no real resemblance to his ex-girlfriend. But regarding Brendan in hindsight, with his wavy dark hair and bronzed complexion, he did share many of Cordy's attributes.**   
  
**And now that Angel took the time to study him, it was so clear that the boy's opal eyes, though much darker and colder than the tender hazel of woman he had come to love, possessed the same perceptive quality of his Seer. He could easily have pass for her younger brother...or her son.**   
  
**If the newspaper could be believed then both Cordelia and Buffy would be around thirty-seven years old now, grown up and old enough to be the mothers to an adolescent son and daughter respectively. Hell, they were probably both happily married and settled down.**   
  
**Angel had to admit he felt a intense surge of jealousy at that thought; not because of his previous relationship with Buffy, no, he had burned that bridge when he turned his back on the Slayer to stand by Faith. No, he was brimming with envy and rage that another man had dared to encroach his bond with Cordelia.**   
  
**For the past eight months after Cordelia's vision induced coma at the hands of Vocah, Angel had been harbouring feelings for his Seer that he had one day hoped to act upon. Now finding out that Cordelia had a child and had no doubt coped quite well without him for sixteen years shot his own emotions for her to pieces.**   
  
**Of course, Angel knew this could all be some elaborate ruse created by Darla to mess with his head or as an attempt to bring back her beloved Angelus but he sensed no such deception from the teenagers. In fact, Ashleigh seemed to be concerned as to why he was at a loss.**   
  
**"So, what's your excuse for 'forgetting' about everything?" Brendan asked, gruffly.**   
  
**"I don't know..." Angel replied honestly.**   
  
**He didn't feel comfortable telling these kids, not matter what their parentage was, that he wasn't sure he belonged in this time. Angel was anti-social, he admitted that, and found it hard to trust those he didn't know, not to mention Brendan had not given the vampire much reason to bequeath his trust willingly. No, he would wait to talk to Giles, Cordelia or Buffy. Anyway, what could a pair of juveniles possibly do to help him? Not even Buffy and Cordelia had ever seemed that young.**   
  
**"Gee, that's the story of your life, isn't it?"**   
  
**Ashleigh rolled her eyes in exasperation. "Bren..."**   
  
**"I'm just making an observation, Ash, no need to get excited."**   
  
**"So, where did you find me?" Angel asked. "I didn't just drop out of the sky, did I?"**   
  
**"No," answered Ashleigh, "we found you by the high school. You were lucky it was before dawn or you would be toast."**   
  
**Brendan muttered something that sounded vaguely like a sarcastic, "Yeah, real lucky."**   
  
**Angel's main concern now was to find out exactly how the hell he ended up sixteen years into the future. Magick had obviously played a part, but by who's hand? Yet, that enigma was secondary for the moment as he tried to discern the exact reason why Cordelia's son was behaving so hostile towards him.**   
  
**Of course, it was a known fact that his Seer could hold a grudge when she wanted to, nonetheless, surely she hadn't spent the past decade-and-a-half raising her son (or even children) to hate him. No, there had to be something deeper than the 'simple' anger no doubt bubbling in Cordelia after he fired her, Wesley and Gunn.**   
  
**Though that did bother Angel for he hoped that his future self wasn't so stupid as to stay away from Cordelia and the others for too long. He had always planned, once he killed Darla, to return to his rightful place at Angel Investigations and by his Seer's side. Angel didn't want to be cut from her life indefinitely, no matter how it would hurt having to watch Cordelia going on to marry and bear a child to another man.**   
  
**Just then, the door opened and Angel was surprised to find himself facing an older version of Rupert Giles. The Watcher had aged gracefully, the only sign that sixteen years had passed was the fact his hair had now completely greyed and some added wrinkles.**   
  
**"So, children, what was so important that I..." His voice trailed off as Giles set eyes on Angel. "Good Lord...Angel?"**   
  
**"Look what we found," Brendan said, breaking the momentary silence. "Ash said we couldn't slay him but I was hoping maybe you would favour Ole Pointy."**   
  
**"Hello, Giles," Angel said, slightly sheepishly.**   
  
**Giles scowled at the vampire then focused his gaze on the teenagers. "Children, why don't you get some rest? No doubt it will be a hectic night tonight and you'll need it."**   
  
**Angel noted the Watcher regard the two adolescents like an uncle would look to their beloved niece and nephew. In response, Brendan's voice mellowed in the Giles's presence and for the first time Angel saw the boy for what he really was; just a boy and not the callous, wrathful young warrior he effectively portrayed. **   
  
**"Why must you insist on calling us 'children'?" Brendan objected, sounding so much like an indignant Cordelia that Angel reeled in familiarity. "Ash is sixteen and I'm gonna be sixteen soon too-"**   
  
**"Not for another eight months, you're not," Giles interrupted**   
  
**Brendan carried on as if the Watcher had not spoken. "And we've both been slaying demons in our after school hours for years now. We don't mind helping you out some more here."**   
  
**"Yeah," Ashleigh agreed, "this sounds much more interesting than getting some boring sleep."**   
  
**"You'll find that when one reaches my age, Brendan, fifteen years old is barely a blink of an eye. And if you both get some sleep now then you'll have plenty of time to finish your English assignment that I know you both have due."**   
  
**"It's so anathema being treated like one of those ignorant air heads in our class."**   
  
**"Is it now?" From Giles's amusement, Angel guessed that was the kind of word the boy had been picked up from the older man or Wesley. "Now off you toddle home, bed then homework are awaiting."**   
  
**"Aww, Uncle Giles," came the simultaneous whines, one last attempt to wheedle the Watcher's mood to their advantage.**   
  
**"Y'know, I was thinking that I don't really need to listen to you now," Brendan said smugly, "I mean, Ash is the Slayer and you're _*her*_ Watcher, not mine."**   
  
**Giles glared at the boy. "Brendan..."**   
  
**"Okay, okay, no need to stress those old heart muscles."**   
  
**"Now run along," Giles said firmly, making it more than clear to the teenagers and Angel that whatever he wanted to discuss with the vampire was not for youngsters' ears. "Ashleigh, your mother is waiting for you and I did promise her I would send you both home for breakfast. I'll call you soon."**   
  
**"Okay," the girl replied grudgingly. She put her hand on Brendan's forearm gently to attract the boy's attention away from Angel. "Come on, Bren, we _*really*_ should go, you know how Mom can get when we're late. You'd think she was the perfect little Slayer when she was our age. Like Uncle Xander hasn't told us all the stories."**   
  
**At the back of Angel's mind, he realized that when Ashleigh talked about her mother she was really meaning Buffy. It was a sobering thought once again thinking of Buffy and Cordelia as mothers to kids a mere couple of years younger than he remembered the Scooby Gang to be. Angel did wonder why Giles only referred to Buffy when sending the pair home when he doubted that Cordelia would have been pleased to hear about her son wandering around at all hours, especially given how over-protective she could be of him, Wes and Gunn.**   
  
**Brendan gave Angel one last glower, a cold reminder that his joviality did not extend to the vampire, then made a more to follow Ashleigh out of the door. Before the pair could leave, Angel did have one last question of the young boy who was very possibly Cordelia's son, one question that had been burning in his mind since he was first aware of teenager's existence.**   
  
**"Brendan?" he called, ignoring Giles's sudden frown when he spoke the boy's name. Both teenagers turned, Brendan's dark eyes slit back in dubious askance. "I was wondering, who…" He sighed. "...Who is your father?"**   
  
**His bets were either on Wesley, for he had always known the ex-Watcher shared a brief history with Cordelia in her high school days, or on some wealthy businessman. Whoever he was, Angel hoped this man was taking good care of his precious Seer and her offspring or he would awaken the wrath of one very pissed off ensouled vampire.**   
  
**However, to his surprise, Brendan just shook his head in disgust at Angel's innocent question. "Who the hell do you think my father is, Angel," sneered the teenager, confirming he did know Angel's identity, "...or should I say, _*Daddy*_?"**   
  
  
**End of Chapter Two**   
**   
  
  
(Hope you guys enjoyed that first segment, just two more to go.)  
**


	2. Parts Three and Four

**Always Darkest Before The Dawn (2/3)  
By Mel (email me at cosmic_quest@yahoo.com)  
  
  
Chapter Three**   
  
**If Giles didn't know it wasn't possible for a vampire to have heart failure, he would have assumed Angel was having an out-and-out heart attack right before his very eyes. As it was, Giles knew that Angel's paler-than-normal pallor, wide eyes and the fact his jaw was practically scrapping the floor just meant the vampire was in a state of shock.**   
  
**And who could blame him? It was not every day that a two century old, immortal, apparently infertile bloodsucker discovered they were a father to a fifteen-year-old boy, and Brendan certainly hadn't made things easy.**   
  
**It wasn't just the admission that no doubt shocked Angel, it was the sarcastic way in which Brendan spat out the word 'Daddy'; never before had the word sounded so...vile. Not that it surprise Giles for he had known Brendan Chase since the boy was born and he also knew the youngster carried within him a rage as dark as the darkest night.**   
  
**It just brought home the reminder that while Brendan was every bit his mother's son when it came to his physical appearance, there was no denying that Angel was the boy's father. Not only did Brendan inherit his father's tendency to brood but where Angel was, Angelus hid below the surface. Brendan just conducted himself with a greater self-restraint than Angelus ever could.**   
  
**Yet it wasn't always like this for Brendan...No, Giles could still remember with a striking poignant clarity the sweet and tender little boy of long ago who was devoted to his mother and idolized his godfather Wesley and his Uncle Charles. But where a young boy could light up the room with a smile, a teenager struck out against his injustices.**   
  
**"I...I can't be...I can't even have children or...or even have..."**   
  
**Under any other circumstances, it would have been amusing witnessing the cool and collected Angel stuttering like a nervous schoolboy so reminiscent of a younger, less confident Xander Harris.**   
  
**"I wish I could say it was good to see you again, Angel, but I was never one for blatant lying."**   
  
**Angel fixed Giles with a firm glare. "It's not true; I can't be that boy's father." But even as he spoke, the Watcher could hear the uncertainty.**   
  
**"Yes," countered Giles, "yes, it is true. Brendan Francis Chase is the only child of Cordelia Chase and Angel the Souled Vampire. I'm not certain about the specifics but I believe he was conceived not long after your soul was anchored...Only you're not Angel, are you? At least, not 'our' Angel."**   
  
**Angel jerked up. "How did you know?"**   
  
**Giles smiled grimly. "Because the Angel I know died three years ago." The statement certainly achieved Angel's full attention. "So, that begs the question, where did you come from?"**   
  
**"This might sound crazy."**   
  
**"This is the Hellmouth; I've found that crazy is the name of the game."**   
  
**"I don't remember those children," Angel said, hesitantly, "I don't remember bringing the girl to Buffy and I sure as hell don't remember fathering a child. I think this is my future, Giles, and," he took an unnecessary breath, "I think I've travelled forward sixteen years into my future."**   
  
**Resisting the urge to laugh out loud at the insane possibility, Giles forced himself to remember that one thing he had learned from both his Watcher training and his life on the Hellmouth was anything was possible. Even a time-travelling vampire. And he had no doubt at all that the man sitting before him was Angel. His reaction to Brendan was too emotional for it to be anyone else.**   
  
**So, instead of disclaiming Angel's statement, he asked, "How?"**   
  
**"Darla maybe, I was fighting her and Dru when this- whatever _*this* _is- all happened."**   
  
**"Darla?"**   
  
**"I take you know she's back."**   
  
**"_*Was*_ back, she was Brendan's first conquest at the tender age of twelve."**   
  
**"A twelve-year-old human boy staked Darla?!"**   
  
**"Yes, well, your son has Cordelia's temper and stubbornness coupled your vampiric strength and a pinch of Angelus' vindictiveness. Not a very good combination."**   
  
**Giles could still remember the ruckus it caused when he and Buffy found out Brendan and Ashleigh, aged twelve and thirteen respectively, had buggered off by themselves in search of Darla. Brendan was never known for his sense of self-preservation and Ashleigh's Slayer strength was still so new to her then. It still amazed him to this day how the pair managed to take out one of the Scourge of ****Europe****. Perhaps, Darla underestimated the rage of a son.**   
  
**"What did Cordelia do when she found out?" Angel asked. "I'll bet she wasn't too pleased at finding out her son had been anywhere near Darla."**   
  
**A wave of sadness swept over Giles. "Cordelia doesn't know, she never will."**   
  
**"They blackmailed you to keep it quiet," Angel said, smiling faintly. "That's the sort of thing Cordy would do so I guess the boy is very much like her."**   
*  
**"No...Angel, Cordelia doesn't know because she died nine years ago. Wesley and the young man, Charles Gunn, also lost their lives with her."**   
  
**It was ironic, really. Ashleigh Summers, the Chosen One whose biological parents she never knew and her adoptive parents certainly not conventional by any means, was a well adjusted teenager and who experienced the easiest transition to uptake her Slayer duties than had ever been recorded.**   
  
**Then there was Brendan, a boy who despite also not having the most average of parents, had the chance to lead a normal life. That's not to say he didn't have a part in the prophecy, he was after all born with the mark of the Powers That Be and certain gifts a legacy of his parentage, but his early years were a world away from the turmoil of the Hellmouth. And maybe had Cordelia lived, had Angel been a father to his son, things might have been different to the teenager now so hell-bent on vengeance.**   
  
** *******************************   
**Angel felt himself collapse into the coach, shaking his head in denial. This was too much for even him. To find out in the space of an hour that not only was he somehow sixteen years into the future and Cordelia had a son but he was the boy's father and now his friends...his true family were dead, had died nine years ago. Gone without knowing the depths of his devotion and love for each of them.**   
  
**It couldn't be true. Cordelia was barely a child herself, and her boundless energy and spirits as immortal as he was.**   
  
**Only she wasn't a child any longer; twenty-seven years old at the time of her death and though young for a human, she no longer was the girl he knew. She had grown up without him and moved on, taking their son with her. Brendan Francis Chase; a fifteen-year-old boy who was half his. His middle name 'Francis' had to be Cordelia's way of paying some homage to Doyle and it saddened Angel that his son was more a part Doyle than him.**   
  
**Yet one thing Angel could not do was deny his part in the boy's parentage. While he had always thought it impossible for a vampire to have produce children, demonology was hardly a conventional science. And then there was his relationship with Cordelia in the months before he fired her and the others. They had become so close, very close, and who knew what would happen as a result of his soul being anchored?**   
  
**However, whatever _*did*_ happen still resulted in history repeating itself. Given Brendan's hostility and the way Giles seemed to behave like he was an absent father, Angel must have left Cordelia and the others again.**   
  
**Another act of sheer stupidity.**   
  
**Much like many humans, it was also every vampire's driven objective to procreate; that was why they sired others. Being ensouled only enhanced Angel's need for family. He had a family in Cordelia, Wesley and Gunn, and apparently he also managed to father a child naturally...and he had wasted everything. His friends were dead and his virtually orphaned son loathed him.**   
  
**"How did they...?" Angel trailed off, unable to complete his question.**   
  
**Giles understood, pity running deep in the Watcher's eyes. "Perhaps I should start from the beginning."**   
  
**"That would be good," Angel said thickly.**   
  
**Moving forward, hesitating only briefly, Giles untied Angel's hands then went to a nearby cupboard where he retrieved a thick photo album. Sitting beside the vampire, he opened the first page which depicted a toddler Brendan seated happily between a smiling Cordelia and Wesley. To an outsider, a person could easily think it a portrait of a young mother and father with their child.**   
  
**Only Cordelia was _*his* _as simply as Brendan was_ *his*_.**   
  
**"They look so happy." Angel smoothed a hand over the picture, lingering over Cordelia's face.**   
  
** "Yes, yes, they were. Wesley and their other friend, Gunn, played a large role in Brendan's early years. Wesley was the godfather, and he and Brendan were very close." It was clear that he meant Wesley was a surrogate father to Angel's son only Giles was too polite to say speak this out loud. "It wasn't easy for Cordelia to have a child like Brendan. He had a vampire's strength almost from birth and has always been able to sense demonic entities around him. Plus, from her role as Seer, he has inherited a psychic link to the Powers That Be and had some psi abilities. Not an easy child to raise for any parent let alone a twenty-two-year-old girl."**   
  
**"She did well with him though. Brendan seems like a great kid other than the fact he loathes ****me.****"**   
  
**"Brendan is a boy with much anger. Although Cordelia tried to keep her own opinion of you away from her son, he's always been very perceptive from a young age."**   
  
**"And what was Cordelia's opinion of me? She must have hated me; I left her and if that wasn't enough, I placed the added burden of pregnancy on her."**   
  
**"If you think that then you really didn't know Cordelia as well as you thought you did," Giles responded, his tone gentle. "Yes, she was angry but she always loved you, and Brendan was never a burden. Not only was he her child but I think a small part of the reason she so doted on him was that he was a part of you."**

**Though he was grateful to hear that from Giles of all people, to carry the knowledge that Cordelia once loved him was heart wrenching. It was too late to act upon those emotions now- nine years too late. She was gone now, and he was left to deal the repercussions of her legacy. More than anything, Angel found himself wishing he could take back the last sixteen years. To be able to return home, beg Cordelia and Wesley to allow him back into their lives and wipe out this whole bleak mess.**   
  
**To re-write this hellish excuse for a future so that his family could live.**   
  
**"What happened?" Angel asked painfully. "I need to know, Giles. I must have had my soul anchored in order to have a child. What happened after the whole Darla situation?"**   
  
**"Which do you want to know about- the first or the second 'situation'?" At Angel's blank expression, the Watcher elaborated. "After spending a number of weeks away pursuing your own agenda in regards to Darla, you did return to Cordelia after leaving the first time. I'm not sure about the exact details- Cordelia and the others always maintained an inner circle in many instances- but you did spend five happy months together where I assume you and Cordelia become closer." Giles watched him speculatively. "I see you're not surprised by this."**   
  
**Angel thought for a moment of denying it, he was always aware of Giles's disapproval when it came to the vampire meddling in the Scoobies' lives and the Watcher did consider Cordelia one of 'his' children regardless of her location. Nevertheless, it didn't matter anymore; the Scooby Gang weren't children now and Cordelia was long dead.**   
  
**"No," Angel admitted, "all that surprised me is that I had the courage to act upon my feelings and that I was stupid enough to destroy whatever we had."**   
  
**The Watcher gazed at the vampire with a look akin to pity before continuing with the story of how Angel came to ruin the very family he had yearned for all his existence. "Apparently, things began to change after the Powers rewarded you with your soul when you prevented some very destructive events from occurring. Darla returned to LA seeking redemption."**  
  
**Darla again. Why did she have to come back? Why couldn't she just die? Angel only had to think of his sire and he was cursing her very existence. She was the bane of his unlife and had he not learned that Brendan had already staked her, he would have hunted her down himself that very minute.**   
  
**"Of course, after seeing the progress Spike had made-"**   
  
**"Spike?" Angel repeated, perplexed. What did his obstinate grandchilde have to do with this?**   
  
**"You didn't know." It wasn't a question; the tone in Giles's voice instantly putting Angel on edge. "I thought one of the children would have mentioned it. Spike and Buffy have been together for about sixteen years now, he is in many ways Ashleigh's father."**   
  
**Angel felt his eyes on the brink of popping out. "Spike and Buffy? Spike and Buffy?! Last time I checked they hated each other."**   
  
**"I'll admit I was stunned at the time, but he's changed. He's a good father and husband, I know he would die to protect Buffy, Dawn and Ashleigh. Besides, last time you checked, you were still a eunuch."**   
  
**"Touché," the vampire conceded, adding with an insulted moan, "and I was never a eunuch."**   
  
**Once upon a time, he would have been brimming over with a seething rage that she could have chosen Spike of all people over him but things had changed...Just as Buffy's heart now belonged to Spike, his belonged to another girl whose love and faith in him was something that he was responsible for destroying himself.**   
  
**Besides, Angel was happy that Buffy had found happiness, and he knew that Spike would always look after her. His grandchilde was many things but his unparalleled passion to love and protect his own always made Angel wonder if the younger vampire really was the 'Big Bad' he portrayed himself to be.**   
  
**Ignoring his last comment, Giles turned the page to a photograph of the AI office with Cordelia and Wesley leaning in front of a desk and Gunn juggling a laughing Brendan, aged around five, standing by the amused couple.**   
  
**"As I was saying, Darla came for aid in seeking her own redemption and you decided to help, despite objections.** **Of course, it was all a charade and when Darla fed off two young families under your protection, you left LA to hunt her down unaware Cordelia was pregnant with your child. You did find out about the boy when Brendan was a few months old but you did right to keep away when Cordelia threatened to stake you if you ever contacted her or your son again."**   
  
**Angel had no words to describe his own sheer dim-witted behaviour. To have left Cordelia once was bad enough, but for him to do so again...well, it was little wonder why Cordelia kept his son from him. She should have staked him then and there.**   
  
**"Then some years later, when Brendan was not even seven years old, the Angel Investigations team- without the Angel- become embroiled in a involving a particularly vicious group of vampires."**   
  
**Giles's eyes darkened as he reminisced. Angel braced himself for what was coming next, he knew the result of the story but not the means.**   
  
**"The night they attacked, Cordelia and the others stood no chance, they were prepared but there were simply too many vampires. I think Gunn and many of his young gang were the first to fall. Cordelia and Wesley sent Brendan through the sewers to safety..." The Watcher, who in his time had seen many deaths and in fact had a hand in ending a number of lives, seemed to have trouble composing himself. "...We arrived in the early hours of the morning after receiving a call from one hysterical little boy. There was barely enough of Wesley to bury. Cordelia hung on for two days but her injuries were just too severe. We laid them to rest together in ****LA-**** their city."**   
  
**For the first time in his existence, Angel was rendered speechless. He knew that Cordelia was dead, Brendan was so frank in informing him of her death and proclaiming Angel's guilt but still to actually have it verified by a man he knew was not only disconcerting but wrenching.**   
  
**It was sickening to hear of how the women he loved and his best friends had been stuck down so brutally, so senselessly. Cordelia was too innocent to have died in such a manner, more than anything she deserved the chance watch her son grow up, see her grandchildren. What was the hardest for Angel to face was the simple fact was that their slaughters might have been prevented had he been there far them.**   
  
**When he had dumped them for a_ *second*_ time to find Darla, he had in essence sentenced his friends to death and his son to a lifetime of dark rage. His future self (or was it past self? He hated time-travel already) was so foolish to believe in Darla wishing to seek redemption. Some evil was just too black to be purified.**   
  
**"This was all my fault," he uttered when he finally found his voice.**   
  
**Giles didn't argue.** **"After the massacre, Buffy and Spike fostered Brendan. Buffy and Cordelia had become very close over the years- both were so young and raising difficult children, they had much in common. Buffy and Spike tried their hardest, raising Brendan alongside Ashleigh, but the damage was done. He's a boy driven by vengeance, not even a Slayer has seen as many vampire kills as Brendan Chase has." He sighed heavily, the weary sigh of a man who carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. "I'll be amazed if he lives to see twenty."**   
  
**Angel remained silent. What could a father say when they heard their son was practically suicidal?**   
  
**"Does he ever ask for me?" Angel finally worked up the nerve to ask.**   
  
**"Yes," Giles said. Before Angel could feel some measure of joy at that, the ageing Watcher finished, "I think he has a special stake for the occasion. We never told him of your death three years ago, we ourselves don't know much. After Brendan's rejection of you not long after his mother's death, we told you to keep away and you did."**   
  
**"He blames me, doesn't he?"**   
  
**"It's easy to forget sometimes but Brendan _*is*_ only a child; he lost his whole family at the age of six because of a business his absent father set up. Of course, he blames you." Giles took his glasses off, cleaning them with a handkerchief. "However, I think if Cordelia hadn't died so prematurely and in such horrific circumstances then it could have been different for you both. Brendan might have come to have a father/son relationship with you."**   
  
**It was Giles's way of trying to absolve Angel of some of the guilt. It didn't work but the vampire took some relief in it. Perhaps, he still had a minute chance in sharing some form of relationship with his son.**   
  
**"Spike?" Angel said, shaking his head, knowing that the emotions were starting to wear on the Watcher, who was no longer as young as he remembered. "I still can't believe him and Buffy are together. And that he of all people is the foster father to _*my*_ son."**   
  
**"Yes, well, I suppose not even he could resist a small six-year-old boy with eyes deader than his could ever be."**   
  
  
**End of Chapter Three**   
  
  
  
**++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++**   
  
  
**Chapter Four**   
  
**Something was going down tonight, the sleepy calm of the day had now been replaced by bustling activity as the twilight hours approached. And yet, Angel found himself rooted to his usual spot on the sofa as he watched the action in awe. It was only now that he found himself with indisputable proof that he was indeed stuck in some future time, how as he watched the older versions of his past friends prepare for battle.**   
  
**He felt like a child whose friends had all grown up around him, leaving him behind. And there was some truth in that imagery.**   
  
**The Scooby Gang had seen many shifts over the years. The most prominent being the absence of ****Willow****Rosenberg****, killed in action with her girlfriend (Angel wasn't sure the exact story there) more than a decade ago. Joyce Summers was also dead, apparently she had passed only weeks after he had 'left' his own time.**   
  
**And everyone else had all grown up and left childhood far behind. Dawn Summers, no longer a little girl, was now living in ****New York**** married with a four-year-old son. Her 'replacements' being Brendan Chase, Ashleigh Summers, and another teenage boy and girl by the names of Jesse and Jodie- the fifteen-year-old twin son and daughter of Xander and Anya Harris.**   
  
**The Scoobies' babies were now considered of age to join in the battle against darkness...Angel had never felt older.**   
  
**What was most shocking to the vampire was finding himself face-to-face with an older _*Spike*_. Older in a very much physical sense; his hair now a wavy sandy brown, long gone was the peroxide blond, and his eyes were a softer blue much like William's, the boy he had allowed Dru to turn, had once been. He still carried himself with athletic grace but it was obvious to Angel's trained eye that he lacked the agility of a vampire. In fact, Spike was now looking very much like a typical forty-something-year-old human male. Not a bad achievement for a supposedly immortal, psychotic vampire.**   
  
**Spike, of course, took great glee in meeting his grandsire, a stark comparison to the discomfort of the others.. "Long time no see, Peaches," grinned the vampire.**   
  
**"Since when did you help out?" Angel spat back, keeping his voice low so as not to allow an already-volatile Brendan hear him insult his foster father.**   
  
**"Well, I've got two Slayers on my back now," replied Spike, "and I'm not the Big Bad you remember. A sacrifice to save the world again then a resurrection and I got me a heartbeat."**   
  
**Angel's brow furrowed deeply. Why had the Powers seen fit to resurrect Spike then allow him to play a part in raising a young Slayer child?**   
  
**"How?" He hated that he couldn't keep the curiosity and burning envy from his voice**   
  
**To his surprise, Spike's features softened in sympathy. "We're not sure, our Seer and her boy went before the Oracles to ask, said this was meant to be."**   
  
**"Oh, Spi-ike?" Buffy called from the weapons cabinet. "You're meant to be helping."**   
  
**"Coming, Luv, just catching up on old acquaintances."**   
  
**Angel watched as Spike rejoined his wife, the younger vampire-cum-human instantly slipping back into the role of the average, loving family guy. His dark eyes narrowed as he mulled over Spike's words.**   
  
**Spike had Shanshu-ed?! While he buggered around searching for Darla, had Spike Shanshu-ed in his place? Though it burned to know his soulless grandchilde had not only been blessed with the gift of humanity that Angel had sought since he was first cursed with a soul, what was most agonizing was that Cordelia and their son had supported Spike by going to the Oracles.**   
  
**Cordelia was _*his*_ Seer, not Spike's. How dare the belligerent urchin try to take her from him.**   
  
**His jealousy was further incited as Angel watched Spike joke around with _*his*_ son, Brendan more at ease with his father's enemy than with his own father. How could things have gone so wrong? That his own child hated him but seemingly hero-worshipped Spike of all people.**   
  
**"Will understands him."**   
  
**Angel turned to the person who volunteered those soft words and found Buffy regarding him rather solemnly. Out of all the Scooby Gang, save Spike, it had to be Buffy who had changed the most in the past sixteen years. Sure, Xander had out-grown his boyish features, gaining twenty pounds of muscle and now sporting a beard, yet nonetheless it was his ex-girlfriend who had grown the most emotionally.**   
  
**Buffy had shed her immaturity, and there was no hint of that selfish 'I'm the Slayer, you must bow to me' attitude so reminiscent of her younger days. Motherhood had no doubt played a large part in her transformation from the occasionally lofty and sullen teenage brat to a wonderful, well rounded woman who reminded Angel of the late Joyce Summers in so many ways.**   
  
**Looking at Buffy with her daughter only served to remind Angel of what Cordelia had been robbed of with her son.**   
  
**"Will?"**   
  
**Buffy shrugged. "It's a long story, let's just say there is a lot more of William in Spike than before."**   
  
**A part of Angel wondered the exact the details of Spike's Shanshu but a larger part was more concerned with his son. "Spike, or Will or whatever you want to call him, understands my own kid better than I do?!" Angel repeated, incredulously. "He's _*my*_ son, Buffy, mine and Cordy's."**   
  
**It still amazed Angel how easily he accepted Brendan. Never once since finding out the boy's parentage had he ever doubted he was the child's father. Maybe it was simply because Cordelia was the mother, or perhaps it was instinctual, but already Angel felt obligated, felt protective towards young Brendan Chase.**   
  
**"But he doesn't know you," Buffy countered. "And with Wesley gone, Brendan turned to Spike."**   
  
**"God, what has this come to? My boy hates me, my friends...my family is dead."**   
  
**"Brendan doesn't hate you."**   
  
**Angel snorted at this. "He certainly isn't behaving like an adoring son."**   
  
**"Oh, he does hate his father, but not you." Angel frowned at her in askance. "You aren't his father, Angel, none of what happened was really _*your*_ fault any more than you're really Bren's father. That was all another Angel, the one who dumped Cordy for a four-hundred-year-old slut. "**   
  
**"No, Buffy, it was me, just a future version of me."**   
  
**Buffy cast him an appraising gaze. "He's curious about you, you know. In many ways, you're still innocent of the things his 'real' father did, you're not the one Cordy threw out her life, and that helps Brendan almost forgive you."**   
  
**Angel's eyes lit up at this, the first good news in all the recent darkness. Before he could question Buffy further, the object of his thoughts approached the pair.**   
  
**"Aunt B, d'you know where you put the Scroll Of Arnolaic that Uncle Giles is harping on about?" the boy asked, his eyes meeting with Angel's briefly.**   
  
**"I think it's up in the attic in the box next to all the Christmas stuff. Do you want me to get it?"**   
  
**"Nah, I'll go, it's better than listening to Giles lecture me about how I'm still too young to be out slaying. I don't get it, you were slaying at fifteen so what's so big about me doin' the same? He never gives Ash or the twins this much hassle."**   
  
**Buffy smiled. "I think Giles finds it hard to remember his youngest Junior Scooby is not a baby he can carry around any more. Go easy on the old guy."**   
  
**Brendan allowed himself to share in her smile, cast one last look at Angel, then strolled out to search for the mislaid scroll. The adults watched him, Angel mulling over what Buffy said.**   
  
**"You think I have some chance to getting to know him?" he asked, hating that he sounded less like the shrewd master vampire he was and more like an uncertain toddler.**   
  
**"He's a great kid, don't doubt his ability to forgive you," Buffy assured, with an insight he admired. The days when it was she who so needed his support, experience and guidance were long gone. "Cordy did a wonderful job with him. He's not totally unable to be reasoned with, you've just got to be willing to put in that extra work. I think Cordy would be pleased you had some chance with him, and Bren knows that."**   
  
**Angel nodded thoughtfully, then made his decision. Before he turned, he spared a smile for his ex-girlfriend. "I hope Spike appreciates you or I'll have to dust him."**   
  
**"Well, he's always telling me how precious I am to him," grinned the former Slayer.**   
  
**He'd once told Cordelia that same when he was in a haze from a session of the Walking Stick; she was stunned at the time and he regretted that she would never know how true that statement was.**   
  
** *******************************   
**"What do you want?"**   
  
**Brendan wasn't surprised to sense Angel's presence enter the attic. He had to give the bloodsucker credit, his old man wasn't worth shit but this younger version of his father was determined to try his best in regards to his son. And deep down, Brendan wanted to reciprocate those tentative efforts for he knew this would be the closest he would ever see of his father.**   
  
**"I thought I'd give you a hand," Angel replied, unperturbed by the boy's animosity.**   
  
**Brendan glowered at Angel, his scowl a constant companion whenever in the vampire's company. "I don't need anything from you." The father and son just scrutinized each other for a moment. "You're not my father, not _*really*, _so why are you bothering?"**   
  
**"So you know then?"**   
  
**"'Course, why d'you think I haven't staked you yet? Aunt B doesn't keep secrets from me, she doesn't lie. That's your job."**   
  
**"Touché," Angel conceded, "and I'm sorry, the regret I feel for leaving you and Cordelia-"**   
  
**"You never left, she_ *threw*_ you out for going behind her back to help that blond slut then getting all dark and obsessive again."**   
  
**"Okay, but even though I'm sorry, it's not my fault. I haven't done anything, Brendan."**   
  
**The teenager studied his father intently. Granted he loathed Angel, he had to admit the guy standing in front of him was, in some ways, different. It was so confusing, all the emotions swirling around; the urge to stake him right there and then balancing capriciously with the natural curiosity of a boy who just wanted to know his father.**   
  
**Brendan relented, shrugging. "I should find that scroll, we'll be facing some bad ass vamps tonight. They're trying to end the world again. Don't these dead buggers ever get sick of the same old tricks?"**   
  
**Angel smiled sheepishly at that, much to Brendan's amazement. His mother had always said for a broody dead guy, Angel could be so bashful at times.**   
  
**"Have you been fighting for long?"**   
  
**"I guess, Mom made sure I mastered martial arts and fencing and stuff from the second I was walking. She always made sure I knew how to protect myself. When she died, Uncle Will and Aunt Buffy took over my training, sometimes Aunt Faith would come and do some stuff with me too."**   
  
**Angel's ear pricked up at the name. "Faith? You know her?"**   
  
**He wondered what would have happened to the wayward Slayer without his support. He had promised to stand by her when she would finally be released from prison, probably another of his trail of broken promises.**   
  
**"Yeah," the teenager replied. "Mom helped her a bit when she got early release. She stuck around for a while, I don't think she got over the fact she wasn't there Mom and the others were k...Anyway, she lives on the East Coast now, got a job in some karate school."**   
  
**"Good," the vampire murmured, at least of one person had not suffered because of him.**

**The boy shrugged. "I saw Aunt Faith change, become one of us. It was then I decided it was my job to fight the good fight too. And when I turned thirteen, I started with Darla as my first claim." He couldn't help smirk slightly with a hint of pride; the vamped-out bitch hadn't expected to go down by the hand of her favourite childe's child.**   
  
**"Yes, I heard." There was a catch in Angel's voice, it wasn't anger at killing his sire but rather the same reproachful quality Brendan heard so many times in Giles's. He didn't approve of his son's chosen 'profession'. Sure enough, Angel said, "Don't you want to do something other than 'fight the good fight'?"**   
  
**"What's better than fighting for the Light?" Brendan frowned, at a loss.**   
  
**"Nothing," Angel said quickly, "it's just you're so young, surely you want to do something normal with your life."**   
  
**"Mom didn't do anything normal." He glowered slightly, more in adolescent irritation than any real anger. "You sound like the others."**   
  
**Angel must have sensed his mood for he pushed the subject further. "The others?"**   
  
**"Yeah, Uncle Giles, Aunt B, Ash; they all worry too much as well. They think I might follow in what could become a Chase family tradition."**   
  
**"What's that?"**   
  
**"Dying young. My mom was only twenty-seven, Uncle Giles worries I might beat that."**   
  
**In the days after his family's deaths, even though Buffy and Spike were the one who fostered him, it was Giles who made a point to spend a great deal of time with the grief-stricken child. It was only as Brendan matured and became aware of both his powers and his own intuition that he understood fully why the Watcher felt so responsible for him. It was guilt, pure and simple.**   
  
**Brendan was a mild empath, a gift from his maternal heritage, and from the remorse he felt from the ageing man he loved like a grandfather, he knew Giles wished he'd done more to keep Cordelia away from Angel back in the very start. If so, his mother might have had a chance of a normal life with a human husband and a bunch of happy children. Instead, all Cordelia Chase had to show for twenty-seven years of life was a grave, which she shared with her two best friends, and one screwed-up kid who was probably destined to join her in premature death.**   
****   
**"Is that something I should worry about too?" Angel asked, worry colouring his tone.**   
  
**Hell, if he carried on like this, Brendan might be led to think the vampire actually cared.**   
  
**"Not really, you needn't think that I'm suicidal or anything, I'm not. I hope I at least live long enough to find the bloodsuckers who were responsible for my family's murders. I have plans for them."**   
  
**Angel's brow furrowed in askance. "What kind of plans?"**   
  
**"Oh, plans involving Chinese water torture with holy water, UV therapy and I always wanted to know what happens if you cut off a vamp's limbs, whether it grows back or not." Brendan hid a wicked grin when he saw Angel's horrified expression. "Hey, I guess I have more in you than you thought or should it be more of Angelus."**   
  
**Angel seemed stunned that he could so casually compare himself to his father's demonic persona.** **"Don't be ridiculous. You're nothing like Angelus."**   
  
**"How do you know? You know nothing about me."**   
  
**Brendan could see it hurt so much for Angel to hear those words from his own son but it was the truth.**   
  
**"You're right," Angel admitted, "I should have been there for Cordelia, for you. I was...am...will be your father, I should have helped bring you up."**   
  
**"You couldn't even bring up phlegm," Brendan hissed. "And you might have been my father by blood but when I think of my father in reality, I think of Wesley or Will. Wes was the one who was there for me, who tucked me in, read me stories, protected me. He died for me; all you were good for was making my mother cry."**   
  
**Angel was speechless. "I made her cry?"**   
  
**"Sometimes, when she thought about you. She tried to make out to me that you were an okay guy but there were nights when I heard her cry, especially when she saw Spike- a once soulless demon- and Buffy making a go of things. She may have cut ties with you but I think she still loved you." Brendan smiled sardonically. "You know, I think she was even thinking of taking me to see you, maybe give things another go."**   
  
**"What didn't she?"**   
  
**"Because she died, died fighting a fight that should have been yours."**   
  
**Angel tried to touch him but the boy stepped back. "You were there, weren't you? It changed you."**   
  
**"Something like that tends to have a lasting effect on a kid."**   
  
**"What happened?"**   
  
**Why was he so interested? Surely it wasn't something that he actually wanted to hear. Brendan was conscious of the fact that Angel harboured feelings for his mother so hearing the exact details of her death would only bring more guilt for the vampire. Was that what he wanted? The evil pathetic-excuse-for-a-father he had always envisioned was starting to fall apart the more time he spent in the vampire's company.**   
  
**"Do you really want to know?" the teenager quizzed, his voice barely audible, "I can show you, if you want."**   
  
**"Show me? How?" Angel asked, curious.**   
  
**"Call it a gift from my mother. She could share the future and she later learnt how to share the past."**   
  
**At his father's hesitant nod, Brendan reached forward, his smaller hands clasped Angel's larger ones. Meeting the vampire's intense stare, the boy opened his mind and his memories.**   
  
******flashback**** **   
****   
**_Flashes of Brendan toddling through the Hyperion, everything seeming so big through a toddler's eyes; being carried around on Gunn's shoulder; Wesley quietly reading to him with the boy snuggled in his bed; the MC Demon, whom the boy referred to as 'Uncle Lorne' singing to him...And Cordelia hugging their son with the ferocity of a loving mother._**   
****   
**_Flickers of insight into his son's life- his first day of nursery, of school, of learning demonology from Wesley. A warm glow lit within the boy as memories of Cordelia and his doting Uncles Wesley, Charles and Lorne flitted through his mind._**   
****   
**_The scene suddenly cut to the Hyperion. The drapes were shut against the night sky and the only illumination in the bullpen of the office was from a dim lamp. Brendan was sitting on the desk as he watched his mother and Wesley dash around the room, pulling out various weapons. The boy's legs dangled carelessly, his feet far from the floor given the six-year-old lacked the height he would develop in adolescence._**   
****   
**_His empathic senses, senses his mother developed some years after gaining the visions, were in overdrive as he picked up on Cordelia and Wesley's raw anxiety and fear. He had never seen the usually self-controlled and collected adults in such a state, and his own worry churned his stomach. Whatever made his mother and uncle tense could not be good._**   
****   
**_"What's wrong?" the boy asked. "Why are you all scared?"_**   
****   
**_Cordelia smiled in rebuke. "Brendan, you know we shouldn't intrude in people's thoughts, it's not nice."_**   
  
**_Suddenly the phone rang, Wesley swiftly answering it before Brendan could reach for it. "Hello, Angel Investigations," he greeted, curtly. Glancing at Cordelia and her son, he turned away at whatever response he received, murmuring answers back. After a brief conversation with the caller, he hung up and turned back, his eyes bleak. "That was one of Gunn's kids- he's out."_**   
****   
**_"Out where?" Brendan asked, guilelessly._**   
****   
**_Wesley spared a watery smile for his godson. "No-where, Bren."_**   
****   
**_"We're next," Cordelia said, moving to her son's side and pulling the boy into her arms._**   
****   
**_The ex-Watcher nodded, melancholy. "Yes, that much is certain."_**   
****   
**_A wistful haze past across Cordelia's eyes, before she grabbed a small backpack and a denim jacket resting by the side of the desk. Setting Brendan on the floor, she tugged the jacket then the backpack onto the bewildered boy before leading the boy into the main office._**   
****   
**_"What's going on?" Brendan asked, sensing the tangible fear from the two adults._**   
****   
**_Cordelia knelt down to her son's eye level, and grasped him lightly by his slender shoulders. "You're going to have to be brave for me now, Bren. I need for you to listen to me, okay?"_**   
****   
**_"I'm listening, Mommy," replied the child, obediently though his eyes shifted from his mother to where Wesley was opening the trapdoor that led to the sewer systems below._**   
****   
**_Brendan Chase might only have been six-and-a-half years old, however, even a boy of such a slight age knew he would not like what he was to be told._**   
****   
**_Wesley rejoined the mother and son, placing his hand on the boy's soft cheek. "You know I love you, Brendan."_**   
****   
**_"I love you too, Unca Wes," Brendan said, uncertainly. He didn't understand why Wesley was talking like this but he didn't like it at all._**   
****   
**_"You're a good boy, Bren, and I know you'll grow to be a fine man. One that I would always be proud to call my chosen son." Wesley's soft brown eyes glistened with unshed tears. He looked up at Cordelia. "I'll be in the front office."_**   
****   
**_The Seer mumbled an acknowledgement, although her eyes were fastened to her child before her. She stroked Brendan's soft hair back from his face._**   
****   
**_The boy bit his lip. "Mommy, something bad is happening, isn't it?"_**   
****   
**_"Yes, something bad is happening." The hardened, intensity shining in Cordelia's eyes scared the boy. "I don't want you to worry about a thing, honey. I just want you to listen to me and you'll be fine."_**   
****   
**_"Okay, Mom. But why are we here? Shouldn't we be out helping Unca Wes get the weapons ready?"_**   
****   
**_"I will in a minute."_**   
****   
**_Brendan didn't like how his mother phrased that response. "_*****We*_ will, I'm gonna be helping, Mom. It's my fight too." He might only have been a small child, but he knew of his own duty in the good fight._**   
****   
**_However, his mother shook her head, putting a hand on the boy's baby soft cheek. "No, Bren, it's not your fight. You're a little boy, one day you'll fight too but it's not going to be here and it's not going to be now. I want you to listen to me now, Brendan, I want you to follow the tunnels to where I showed you and then get out and take the first bus to Sunnydale. Your Aunt Buffy and Uncle Spike will protect you."_**   
****   
**_Now it was Brendan's turn to shake his head. "No, Mom, I want to stay with you." He tried to squirmed away but Cordelia had a firm grip on his shoulder._**   
****   
**_"Do as I say," Cordelia said, firmly but not unkindly. Her voice cracked a little. "I need for you to do this. Please?"_**   
****   
**_At the pleading tone in the Seer's voice, the boy halted his struggles. He would do anything for his mother, even walk away when she asked him to._**   
****   
**_"Okay, okay, I'll go, Mommy."_**   
****   
**_Struggling to choke back his tears and not make this any harder for his mother, Brendan threw himself into her arms. Cordelia embraced him tightly, stroking his hair._**   
****   
**_"Remember, Bren," she murmured, "I'll always be with you, not matter what happens..."_**   
****   
**_ *******_**   
**_Buffy opened the door and entered the hospital room followed by Brendan and Spike. The vampire's hair was his natural colour and he appeared to have aged slightly, a sign he was now human. A further indication of his evident humanity was how the former vampire's hand rested on the child's shoulder in an effort to comfort him._**   
****   
**_Brendan pulled away from the adults and moved further into the room, his wide eyes fixed on his mother. Cordelia was unconscious; her face pale and waxen, her body attached to so much medical paraphernalia she looked less like a woman and more like some kind of robot._**   
****   
**_Brendan glanced back at his guardians; tears pooled in the adults' eyes. Turning back to Cordelia's still form, he swallowed then inched to her side._**   
****   
**_"Mom?" whispered the boy. "Mommy, please come back. Don't leave me alone..."_**   
  
**_ *******_**   
**_Brendan was crouched by a grave plot. Despite the shroud of darkness gracing the cemetery, the youngster was more than aware of someone creeping up behind him; his heightened senses the soft footsteps over the grassy path towards him._**   
****   
**_"Hello, Aunt B," he murmured, not even turning._**   
****   
**_"Lorne said you'd be here." The boy heard Buffy sigh heavily, she knelt down by his side. "Brendan, we were worried sick. You know you shouldn't go wandering around at night. LA is not a safe place for a child."_**   
****   
**_"Vampires can't drain me."_**   
****   
**_"I'm not just talking about vampires, there are bad humans out there as well."_**   
****   
**_"The mood I'm in, it's the perverts who are the ones who should be scared...I-I just wanted to see them again before we go back to Sunnydale."_**   
****   
**_The boy reached forward, his tiny fingers hesitantly touching the greenish marble of the large grave stone. He traced the words inscribed into the stone, which read:_**   
****   
**_-----_**   
**Cordelia Chase**   
** 1981-2009**   
  
**Wesley Wyndham-Price**   
** 1975-2009**   
  
**Charles Gunn**   
** 1978-2009**   
  
**They fought the darkness and protected the light**   
  
**Dearly missed by Brendan and their special family**   
  
**'Even when I walk through the valley of death,**   
**I will fear no evil'**   
**_-----_**   
****   
**_"Book of Psalms, chapter twenty-three, verse four. God, I have be the only vampire who knows the Bible by heart, huh? Wes says we should have an understanding of all religious scriptures in our line of work." He still spoke in present tense in regards to his late uncle._**   
****   
**_"Wesley taught you well, Bren," Buffy said softly._**   
****   
**_Brendan smiled faintly at a memory. "Yeah, he said it was important for me the learn about these things. He used to do different voices when he read the Bible out to me sometimes. For a walking encyclopaedia, he can be so goofy...could be," he corrected, morosely._**   
****   
**_The boy and Slayer sat in silence for a while then Buffy cleared her throat. "Angel came to see me today. He wants to see you."_**   
****   
**_"Well, I don't wanna see him."_**_ **Brendan's voice was sharp and adamant, the sheer force of his determination so like his mother's.**_   
****   
**_"Brendan, he's your father-"_**   
****   
**_"I hate him! I hate more than anything. It's all his fault. Mommy...Wes and Unca Charles...They would still be here with me if it wasn't for him. He's not my father. And if you make me see him, I swear I'll drive a stake right through his heart then wash his ashes away with holy water."_**   
****   
**_The boy's words were more vicious than any six-year-old's voice had a right to be. The anger and rage were vehement._**   
  
**_"It's okay, you know I would never force you to see him. God knows, Angel hasn't been a part of your life before and that doesn't have to change if you don't want it to." Buffy smoothed the boy's unruly hair. "Bren, I know what it's like to lose a mother. You won't ever forget the pain but it will get easier to deal with, and we'll always be here for you. Me, Will, Giles, Xander and Anya, the other kids, you'll have us always. Cordelia was my friend, and I would do anything to protect her boy," she smiled slightly, "especially when he's as handsome and wonderful as you."_**   
****   
**_"I know...Aunt Buffy, I was thinking and I figured that we each want what the other has."_**   
****   
**_"What do you mean?"_**   
****   
**_"You had much longer with your mom than I'll ever have...And I, I'll have the chance to avenge my mother's death."_**   
  
******end flashback**** **   
  
**As the vision misted over, Brendan pulled away from Angel, self-consciously fidgeting. For his part, Angel was literally speechless. What could he say to the boy after experiencing his pain and fear first-hand? There was nothing in the world he could do to atone for what he did to Cordelia and his son the day he abandoned them, and he finally understood why Brendan maintained his vicious hostility even after all the years that had passed.**   
  
**Cordelia's bittersweet words to her young son in their last moments together rang out in Angel's mind as well as Brendan's disturbing vow of vengeance. He wasn't surprised to find his eyes slightly damp; he hadn't cried for over a century.**   
  
**"Not happy viewing, huh?" Brendan muttered, breaking the silence between them.**   
  
**"You must hate me," was all Angel could force his voice to say.**   
  
**"I did, I do...But you're not him. My father is the one who left the good fight, you haven't done so yet."**   
  
**Pride in his son swelled within Angel. How hard it must have been to utter those words to someone who in many ways caused the death of your family. It was far more than what he himself would say to anyone who had done likewise.**   
  
**Brendan chewed his lip then said, softly, "Their deaths weren't entirely my father's fault though."**   
  
**"What do you mean?"**   
  
**"Mom and Wes could have gotten away." When the boy spoke, it was without the usual confidence and aloofness that favoured his voice. It was almost as if he was divulging a confession. "When they put me into the sewers, Mom and Wes went back to fight off the vamps, keep them off my back. I knew them too well, they wanted to give me the best chance, they always did things like that." Brendan sighed, wearily. "You know, Mom used to get this look in her eyes, one that told me she'd do anything, she'd lay out her own life, to protect me whether I wanted that or not. And that night she had to."**   
  
**Looking at the boy before him, seeing him properly for the first time, Angel realized that Brendan still carried the softness of childhood in his physical features but it was his eyes...They carried a weight far heavier that any fifteen-year-old kid should know.**   
  
**This boy before him was his last link to Cordelia and anything he might have had with her. He didn't want to see Brendan walk down the same path of death and destruction that his parents had been so familiar with. It had become vitally important to Angel to provide something better for his son, give him a second chance.**   
  
**"Oh, look, found the scroll," Brendan said, pulling a rolled up piece of parchment from a box. After his disclosure a few moments ago, the boy seemed eager to escape from his father's company. "Better get this to Giles before he blows a gasket." He quickly moved to the door.**   
  
**"Brendan?"**   
  
**Angel couldn't just let him go like that. They had made some progress and he wasn't about to flush that away to save himself the discomfort of using his pathetic people skills which Cordelia had tried so hard to hone.**   
  
**"I...I know that your mother would be very proud of you. I might not really be your father but you certainly feel like my son. You've done so well despite all that has happened, and I want you to know that I'm very proud of you too."**   
  
**The boy smirked. "You should be, I have a whole book of prophecies written about ****me.****"**   
  
**"You don't say," Angel smiled. He watched his son stop at the door then turn when he called his name once more, feeling the need to say more. "Bren, it wasn't your fault, your mother wouldn't want you to go through your life thinking it was. You were not even six years old, if you had stayed then there would be four bodies buried in that tomb. Cordelia would have rather died a thousand times than seen that happen. Always remember that."**   
  
**For a moment, Brendan was silent then he nodded slightly. "And it wasn't your fault either...Father."**   
  
**Angel watched as the boy left the room, for the first time since arriving in this place his heart warm. He had never thought someone would ever call him 'Father'; sure, Drucilla addressed him as 'Daddy' when she was having one of her episodes but the feelings of tenderness and love were never present, not like what he associated with Brendan.**   
  
**After tonight, he was going to make an effort to carve some sort of relationship with his and Cordelia's son. She might been dead, however he still had a responsibility to make things right even if he was nine years too late. Angel was more than aware he would never really be the boy's true father- both literally or metaphorically- but some bond between them was better than nothing.**   
  
**"Thank you so much, Cordy," he murmured to the girl who had given him the best gift ever.**   
  
  
**End of Chapter Four**   
  
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++  
**Well, I hope you guys are still with me and are enjoying this story. Please feel free to email me with any comments you have.**  
  
  



	3. Part Five and Epilogue

**Always Darkest Before The Dawn (3/3)  
By Mel (email me at cosmic_quest@yahoo.com)  
  
****Chapter Five**   
  
**It was never meant to be this way.** **After their late night fight against evil, Angel and Brendan were meant to return home and work on making up the fifteen years of father-son relationship they had missed. Brendan was supposed to grow up to be a more balanced young man and Angel was to find a way to live in a world without Cordelia.**   
  
**Only Angel had learned through bitter experience that life never moved in the way he wished it would.**   
  
**The Scooby Gang, all grown up with their junior members present, had gone to the abandoned church where the showdown with scazem demon and his disciples- who were, of course, intent on opening the Hellmouth- was due to take place. Angel was surprised how well trained the young generation of Scoobies were and how the adults were now as organized as any military unit.**   
  
**From the minute they arrived at the church, each set about their own task; Giles, Anya and Jesse worked on their scroll and spell, Xander and Jodie used the heavy-duty weaponry whilst the feistier fighters of the elder and younger Slayers, Spike, Brendan and Angel relied on stakes and their physical strength.**   
  
**Still, despite all the Scoobies being present and with the added support of Angel, it became painfully obvious they were seriously outnumbered. It wasn't long before Buffy and Spike, now physically adults in their forties, were the first to tire, bleeding from wounds and struggling to keep pace. As he fought, Angel caught sight of Jodie falling and Xander understandably abandoning his post to protect his daughter and carry her to a safer position.**   
  
**It was in the thick of the bloody battle when Angel noticed one of the demon's disciples, standing in the safety of the upper ledges, aim a crossbow at their strongest fighter Ashleigh. Just as he moved to push the girl out of the way, Brendan also took heed of the demon's objective.**   
  
**Closer to Ashleigh, the boy sprinted towards his best friend with the agility of a feline and Angel could only watch, his usually dextrous limbs frozen in sheer shock, as his son was unable to shift from the arrow's speeding target. Brendan fell back as the arrow tore it's way into his unprotected chest and then there was a lull, the boy silent and still with the weapon sickeningly protruding from his body.**   
  
**Rushing to Brendan's side, uncaring for the fight or without regard to himself, Angel grabbed a a stake from his belt. He projected the stake with strength fuelled by his grief and rage and with perfect accuracy, the demon who had dared to harm his son collapsed forward and dropped to the floor. **   
  
**The strong coppery scent of blood pervaded Angel's sense of smell before he reached his fallen son and as he knelt beside the boy, pulling his smaller form into his arms. Usually, even the hint of blood would have set Angel's saliva glands watering in hunger but this time he felt nothing, only the pain of seeing his son squirming in agony in his arms.**   
  
**Nearby, Ashleigh's eyes watered at her friend's plight though her slayer instincts forced her to continue the fight leaving Angel to tend to Brendan alone.**   
  
**"You're going to be fine," Angel said softly.**   
  
**Brendan, despite his injuries, managed to muster a sarcastic snort. "Don't...think so..."**

**Angel wanted to just pick the boy up and race him to a hospital yet a deeper sense within him could see his son's time was ticking, drawing to a close. He had killed so many children as in his time of Angelus, walking away from their broken bodies without a second thought. Even ensouled, while the death of a child did sadden him, he was not unduly affected as most humans were.**   
  
**Until today.**   
  
**Ironically, it took the pain of his own son's injuries to fully comprehend why people so mourned the death of a life cut short far too son. Brendan didn't deserve this, he was just a little boy. He should be living, free...not slipping away from the glorious adventure of life.**   
  
**It couldn't happen like this. Not to his boy dammit! Not to the one who was his last link to Cordy.**   
  
**Angel was overwhelmed with denial, he wasn't just going to watch Brendan die. He wouldn't. "Don't talk like that, we'll get you to a hospital and-"**   
  
**The strains and struggles of his friends fighting faded into the background, his son's wheezing amplified in his ears. He adjusted Brendan into a more comfortable position, holding the boy tenderly like one would hold a new-born infant. The boy moaned softly but kept his hold on consciousness with the tenacity of his mother.**   
  
**Feelings of helplessness and inadequacy swelled through Angel, he hadn't felt so useless since Cordy lay in a vision induced coma. For all his strength and prowess, he could nothing now but watch the boy die before his eyes.**   
  
**Angel felt a soft touch on his cheek and looked down to meet Brendan's gaze- dark eyes fusing with identical dark eyes. "D...don't be sad," the boy choked out, his stare softening for the first time.**   
  
**Damn, for all he had done to his son, the boy was protecting him from the pain.**   
  
**"I've...missed Mom," Brendan murmured, a tear escaping from his eye.**   
  
**The vampire understood, Brendan was tired. He was letting his father know he was going to be okay as he let go.**   
  
**"You'll see her soon," Angel reassured softly, no matter how difficult it was to allow his son to let go.**   
  
**Brendan scrutinized him for a moment that seemed to span an eternity then he spoke in a wispy voice so stark in comparison to his typical strong timbre. "Did...did you l-love...my mom?" The boy was struggling to breathe, fighting for each precious drop of oxygen to feed his failing lungs. Blood welled from his mouth, trickling down his chin.**   
  
**Angel gently cleaned the blood away with his sleeve. "I do..." He spoke in present tense, thinking of the girl he saw just a few short days ago and all that he truly felt for her, blocking out her tragic fate and his own part in it. "I love her more than anything."**   
  
**His own tears dripped from his cheeks onto Brendan's bleached features. The teenager slowly reach to touch the moisture then glanced back to his father, his eyes now glazing over, losing the life that had once bloomed so vibrantly before.**   
  
**In a soft whisper, almost inaudible to even Angel's heightened senses, he whispered. "T-then...we....we'll be...w-waiting f-f-for you...on the other s-side..." His eyes fluttered shut and his hand dropped weightlessly to his side.**   
  
**Angel felt the boy's form suddenly going completely limp and boneless in his arms. He shook him, more fervently. He wasn't ready to say goodbye yet, he didn't want to be alone. He _*needed*_ Brendan back.**   
  
**"Bren...come on, wake up!" His voice was broke at the last word, tears now freely rolling down his face. "Don't go..." Angel brushed a strand of hair from his son's face. "Brendan..." he murmured, forlornly.**   
  
**The father cradled his dead son's body close to him. The boy whose infancy and childhood he had lost out on because of his obsession with Darla. Instead, it was Wesley who had helped tuck _*his*_ child in at night, who had comforted Brendan and protected him. Cordelia had been right to cut him out of Brendan's life, he didn't deserve the boy's love.**   
  
**"Poor little boy," sneered a mocking voice.**   
  
**Angel forced himself to turn from his son to find himself face-to-face with a grinning vampire who stared in disgust at the other's grief. If Angel had the energy, he was would have easily overpowered and staked this pathetic minion. But Brendan's weariness was contagious and all he wanted was to remain by his boy's side.**   
  
**"And poor little traitor shedding tears for a human." The grimly, filthy creature smirked, producing a long pointed plank of wood. "Well, let's reunite you."**   
  
**"Angel, no!"**   
  
**Buffy's screams were cut short as Angel welcomed the sharp, intense pain of the make-shift stake piercing his still heart. The pain lasted a long moment then he embraced the guiding light as his ashes fell to the floor...**   
  
** *******************************   
**He gasped for unnecessary air, sitting up in his bed. The glare of the sun despite the closed drapes blinded him, Angel putting his arm up to shield his eyes. Slowly adjusting to the light, he glanced around in a familiar bewilderment.**   
  
**What had happened? He was meant to be dead.**   
  
**Reaching to his bedside cabinet, he pulled over the newspaper he had bought as a tool to track news of Darla's victims. The date printed at the top of the ****Los Angeles**** Times stated '****March 15th 2001****'. He was home, in his own time the morning after when Darla had last threw him from that warehouse roof.**   
  
**Had it all been a dream? Was Brendan all but a figment of his imagination, a representation of the child he could only hope for?**   
  
**He felt a dull ache in his chest as he shifted in the bed. Frowning, Angel peeled back his shirt taking a sharp intake of breath at what he saw. Above where his unbeating heart lay the skin was marred by an inflamed tender scar, which in a normal human would be the remains of injury inflicting the heart. The wound was painful, fresh and deep, yet he was still here and not a pile of dust.**   
  
**A scent filled his sensitive nose, and he raised his sleeve up to his face. Though his sleeve was clean, there was a strong scent of blood...Brendan's blood, a smell reminiscent of both Cordelia's and, well, his own.**   
  
**"Brendan...?" he whispered.**   
  
**Suddenly, the weight of his son's limp body was once again vivid in his memory where it was forever embedded in his mind...But only the boy wasn't born yet, he wouldn't even be conceived for a good few months. The slate, while scratched, was still clean. Cordelia, his friends, they were all alive and well.**

**This meant he had a second chance to rectify his mistakes! He might not have deserved it, God only knew how many second and third and fourth chances Angel had frittered away but this time he wouldn't allow fate to slip through his fingers.**   
  
**Angel would do whatever he had to in order save his Seer and son before it was too late.**   
  
**He would do whatever it took- apologize repeatedly, go on his hands and knees to beg, bribe, anything- but he make Cordelia trust him again and let him back into her life. And this time, he would keep her safe, he would protect her with the ferocity she deserved. No-one, be it Darla or Wolfram and Hart, would separate him from her side.**

**Then, when he had time, Angel would visit Sunnydale where his ex-girlfriend and grandchilde lived...After all, Buffy and Spike had not even a year before they would have their own little arrival on their hands.**   
  
  
**End of Chapter Five**   
  
  
  
**++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++**   
  
  
**Epilogue**   
  
**Angel glanced out the window and shook his head in resigned amusement at the little boy, who was gleefully swinging from a tree under the watchful gaze of the young man who was sharpening his tools in the light of the moon. He could never tire of seeing his boys together- Connor and Brendan, the sons he was never meant to have.**   
  
**Brendan was bouncing around, chattering non-stop to his ever patient elder brother. It still amazed him at the never-ending bound of energy possessed by a child so young. From the time he woke up at the crack of dawn until the time he grudgingly trudged to bed at night, he was a boisterous handful- one that Angel had to watch constantly least he fall foul to another of his mischievous jokes. And Connor, he had come so far in the short time Angel had reclaimed him though he was no less of a handful than his young brother. **   
  
**But both were handfuls he would never relinquish no matter what...**   
  
**For a former vampire over two centuries old who had no clue about with raising a family, Angel found himself remarkably comfortable with the position of father. His little taste six years ago had taught him to be the best parent a child could have; that bitter and dark Brendan would never be allowed to develop. His family would only know the light.**   
  
**He glanced to the calendar hanging nearby. The year was now 2009 and today was that fated day when his son, that other Brendan, had watched his mother and uncles slain as they lay down their lives for him. Angel shivered, he couldn't imagine his very young, very innocent six-year-old child witnessing what his other could-have-been son had seen.**   
  
**Once realizing what had happened, the gift of sight he had received from whoever had sought to give him another chance, Angel had been filled with a new-found sense of determination. It took him a month to successfully convince Cordelia and the others he had changed before they allowed him back into their lives.**   
  
**Of course, nothing was ever simple for them. Darla could never just die and leave them be, she would never allow things to be so easy for him. But the present she left was not what he had expected or been prepared for, namely their son Connor, the only child to be conceived of two vampires and every bit as precious as Angel's human family.** **And for a brief moment, Angel understood why his alternate self was fooled by his sire's claims of redemption when he witnessed Darla sacrifice herself to give their son life.**   
  
**Only Connor's childhood was doomed to be almost as dark as his alternate brother's had been. Kidnapped at the age of two months to be returned just a few short months before they discovered Cordelia was pregnant with Bren though accelerated to the age of sixteen, it had been a tough road for father and son to build a relationship. Connor had been so bitter, possessing the same bottled dangerous rage that seemed so familiar to Angel whenever he reminisced over the possible future Brendan. And in many ways, bonding with Connor was Angel's living reminder of how easily his happiness could be snatched away if he wasn't careful.**   
  
**Now, watching his boys laughing and playing, it was reminder Angel would never let go. For the joy his children had brought into his life was worth any sacrifice he had to make in the past.** **Just as the unrelenting, deep love he shared with Cordelia, Brendan's adoring mother, was a bond he would rather die for than lose to his dark past.**   
  
**When he was with Buffy, he thought that was happiness. Now he saw that was nothing compared to the pure, burning love he felt for his family. His life was finally on a track he was proud of, and he could feel the hint of humanity forming beneath the surface of his body. His Shanshu was coming and he was more than ready for it. It was just a goal before, now it was the final piece to perfection, to the completion of having a normal life.**   
  
**A sharp shriek shattered Angel's thoughts and he quickly dashed outside to find the weeping boy crouched on the ground, examining a grazed knee with Connor was trying to tend to the reluctant child.**   
  
**"What is it with kids and trees?" Connor asked with a frown. The simplicity of climbing trees in childhood was never a luxury he could have afforded growing up in a hell dimension.**

**Through his soft cries, Brendan managed to tearfully retort, "You had demons to slay and I got trees!"**   
  
**"Trees, demon hunting- where did my kids get this daredevil streak from?" Angel murmured as he knelt beside the smaller boy.**   
  
**He knew full well the answer his question, however. With a vampire father fighting the good fight coupled with a vivacious and headstrong mother (or big sister figure in Connor's case) equally involved in the fight, it was little wonder their children were following fast in their footsteps.**   
  
**"It...it hurts, Daddy," little Brendan whispered. He tried to be brave but his lip was quivering and his expressive dark eyes were flooded with tears.**   
  
**Angel bit back his reproaching tirade and put his arms around the tiny frame pulling his son into his arms effortlessly. "Come on, scamp, we'll put a plaster on that and make it all better."**   
  
**"'Kay."**   
  
**In the kitchen, while Connor distracted his brother by regaling him with stories of his own -more gruesome- childhood injuries, Angel cleaned the graze with Savlon, inwardly proud at the show of bravery from the little boy who only whimpered slightly when the cotton ball drenched in disinfectant touched his wounded skin. He awarded his son with a '****Sesame Street****' plaster and a chocolate chip cookie.**   
  
**Grinning contentedly, Brendan threw his arms around Angel. "You made it better."**   
  
**Angel embraced his child closer, smoothing his silky dark hair and inhaling the little-boy scent of cookies and milk. "You know your Daddy takes care of his boy, Bren," he murmured back.**   
  
**"And what are my men doing?"**   
  
**Father and sons looked up to see Cordelia enter the kitchen, carrying their youngest Kaitlin in her arms.**   
  
**"Look at my plaster, Mommy." Brendan held his knee up for his mother's inspection.**   
  
**"You should be happy, when I was a kid we had to dress our cuts with leaves and grass," Connor replied, tousling his brother's hair.**   
  
**Brendan frowned, smoothing his hair back in place in a gesture so obviously Angel's, then rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, and you had to walk ten miles, in barefeet _*and*_ in the snow, to school. Sometimes you sound just like Dad, like two old grandpas going on about the olden days."**   
  
**"Hey!" retorted Angel and Connor, in mock insult.**   
  
**Cordelia smiled in amusement. Never let it be said the boy lacked his mother's sharp wit. "Now what happened to my baby's knee?"**   
  
**"I'm not a baby, Mommy. I cut myself but I never cried."**   
  
**"That's because you're my brave boy," Cordelia smiled, pecking him softly on the cheek.**   
  
**"What about me?" Angel protested in feigned indignation.**   
  
**Cordy snorted. "He who was scared of taking Kait and Jonathan to see the 'Teletubbies' movie."**   
  
**"Hey, those things rot the mind."**   
  
**His wife smiled in amusement. She moved closer, whispering playfully in his ear, "Wimp." Then she kissed him before Kaitlin's tiny hands push him back.**   
  
**"Kissies too," demanded the toddler.**   
  
**Angel swiftly swooped the giggling child into his arms and peppered her with loud, exaggerated kisses and tickles, revelling in his daughter's delight.**   
  
**Like Connor, eighteen-month-old-old Kaitlin had been a complete surprise to Angel. While he had always expected Cordelia to fall pregnant with their son, he had never thought of the consequences to their family were he to remain by her side after the birth.**   
  
**As it was, their precious daughter Kaitlin was not the only surprise. Barely a year before Kaitlin was born, Spike and Buffy had welcomed the birth of their son whom they name Jonathan. And as for the rest of the family, Wesley- his son's godfather- and his wife Fred, a young woman they had rescued from an another world, were enjoying the delights of their toddler Cameron. And Gunn was making the first moves to settling down with Faith, the rehabilitated Slayer who had joined them along the way bringing with her a son, the now five-year-old Joshua.**   
  
**Of course, not everything was a fairy tale. Angel and the others were by no means naive to the fact that it was no coincidence their respective children were so close in age. Brendan in the alternate world was not joking when he said he had a book of prophecies dedicated to him; there were days when it seemed there was a whole library of prophecies relating to the children who faced the same apocalyptic battles as their parents fought before them. For now, all their parents could do was protect and educate them.**   
  
**Back in Sunnydale, Spike had become human four months ago but the transition to humanity had been in no way smooth for neither him nor his family. Still, despite his grandchilde recovering his humanity first, Angel was not envious as he began to realize that they each had their own destiny and there were some times when the Scooby Gang would walk a different path than his family.**   
  
**Angel Investigations still fought for the Powers That Be under the guise of private investigations hunting down evil and protecting the innocent with Wolfram and Heart still rattling their sabres from time-to-time. During those turbulent moments, 'Uncle' Lorne- the universal godfather to this next generation of champions- would take care of the children who were destined to take over from their parents when the time came to pass the torch.**   
  
**However, the day was still many years away. And the difficulties they faced was easier to deal with compared with than the early years. Cordelia, Wesley and Gunn had matured and their training much advanced and as for him... Angel was starting to let his dormant humanity drive him more and more.**   
  
**Only time would tell how their lives would turn out, he had no more hints or insights. From this day, in that other world, Brendan's life had been based in Sunnydale without Cordy's visions to guide them on LA victims and instead they passed to the boy, focusing on the hopeless of Sunnydale. A completely different set of demons than what they would face now, since they were still based in LA.**   
  
**It was strange to think that from this day on, he was setting a completely different path and ensuring that other timeline would never exist. So focused on preventing that day from where Cordy and his friends would die so brutally, Angel had never considered what would happen afterwards. Before he had little titbits from overheard conversations by Brendan and the others, some clues of what demons they would face and how to defeat them.**   
  
**It was different now. Angel didn't know what was going to follow, and he surprisingly he liked it like that. He made him feel...human.**   


**THE END**   
  


**++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++**   
**Well, that's it, I hope you enjoyed it. Remember this story was actually started ages ago, in the middle of the second season and long before we knew of baby Connor's introduction and the older Connor's re-appearance so things might seem weird here and there. In this revised version of the story I've tried to include Connor in at the end to make things a bit more 'authentic'. I plan to maybe write more in this universe, perhaps a S/B story telling of Spike gaining his humanity or Buffy being the one to experience a flash of the future where she sees her life with Spike and their children. Anyway, please email me with any comments in this story or any other my others.**

  



End file.
